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Hi,
Donoreo is right, although in this sort of situation I would be tempted to go for ISO 800 and deal with any noise later. As far as the flash is concerned, this depends entirely on how close you will be (remember the Inverse Square Law from school?). At ISO 800 your built-in flash probably won't be much good beyond about 20M and no less annoying than if you hire some mega-blast unit for the occasion.
If it's a high-ceiling venue, which it probably will be, then bouncing the flash to give you softer lighting won't work as you'll lose too much light in the process.
When my daughter graduated from uni I was sitting in the audience and shot at ISO 800 (no flash) 200mm @ f5.6 and the results were quite acceptable.
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